The Fight

The demons think they won
Because they saw my knee bend to an idol,
Oh, but they don't know how far I've gone
In search of the truth, I flew to the highest heavens and to the very pit of hell
Lucifer has been following me for years,
Truth is he has no choice but to obey me
I never thought I'd be the one in control of the afterlife,
But here I sit, judging my fallen sister
I swear I didn't know what I was doing
I never meant to converse with the dead,
But she's told me so many things
And now, I cannot get her out of my head
I made a bed of flowers for her,
Up in that secret room inside my mind
And it shocked me to find her sleeping there 
I still don't know why she keeps coming back
Is it because I forgive her every time?
Is it because she really is Lucifer and I just don't know it?
Or could it actually be that the dead are talking to me?
She told me in hell they don't just make humans become slaves,
They make them become demons too
They make them torture people,
Then they make them clean up the blood
I don't ever want to end up in hell,
But somedays I feel like I fell too far
Too far for Jesus to reach,
Oh, but isn't that impossible?
I thought there wasn't anywhere He couldn't reach
If Stephanie really is a demon,
And has me fooled
I pray God forgives me again
I know I can't save anyone,
I'm just as human as everyone else
But there's a part of me that is jealous, 
Jealous of God and all the praise He receives,
There's a dark root, some ancient curse from long ago
It runs in my bloodline and has been hurting my relatives for generations 
When will He break this curse?
I've begged Him many times, but He refuses to answer
Are You angry at me, Lord?
Have I failed You for the last time?
Or will You, in all Your kindness, forgive me yet again?
I hope You do because I can't even breathe without You